Matthew 18:15-20
15“If another member
of the church sins against you, go and point out the fault when the two of you
are alone. If the member listens to you, you have regained that one. 16But if
you are not listened to, take one or two others along with you, so that every
word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17If the
member refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if the offender
refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a Gentile and
a tax collector. 18Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound
in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. 19Again,
truly I tell you, if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will
be done for you by my Father in heaven. 20For where two or three are gathered
in my name, I am there among them.”
With my parishes history with conflict avoidance and the inevitable results, this was never going to be an easy text to preach on. I was pretty happy with the results... unfortunately, I then did my back on the Saturday and never got to preach!
Never mind, I learned from it anyway.
Did anyone else find themselves shifting awkwardly in their
seats during the gospel reading today? Or were there feelings of smug
self-satisfaction that any conflict in your life is handled with the upmost
care and discretion? Another question for you - How do we, as a nation, as a
church, as a parish community and as individuals, handle conflict?
I suspect if we are to be honest, the answer to all of these
is – not very well.
We do not handle conflict well.
Let me be very clear– conflict in and of itself is a normal
and healthy part of a Christian life. It is through conflict that we are able
to grow and mature in our faith and practice. But just as the Christian Church
attracts broken people (for Jesus has come for us as we are, calling the
grieving and the suffering and the
sinners), so it suffers from the sin of that brokenness which often expresses
itself in ugly and shameful ways within conflict situations.
We are rather expert at spotting those rabble rousers around
us, identifying their destructive habits, and condemning the ways they seek to
destabilize our communities. Noticing when we are engaged in these very same
behaviors is another story. After all, some of those troublesome people are us
The context of this passage of scripture is particularly
interesting. If we look at the verses that immediately precede it, we see the
parable of the lost sheep. The shepherd in this story did not give up after a
cursory hour or so of looking – he persisted through the night until the sheep
was found. We are told in the passages afterwards that we need to forgive not 7
times, but 70 times 7. So we are looking at conflict resolution seen through a
lens of seeking out and forgiveness.
There is some debate as to whether these words are in fact
the authentic voice of Jesus. In some ways this doesn’t matter – the wisdom is
of God even if the words are not straight from Jesus mouth. I think it is
important to note this though because the words given by Mathew to Jesus about
casting out a member of the community seem not to reflect the character of
Jesus as we know him. Various
interpretations try to use the placement of this text as a warning to only
apply what is basically excommunication in extreme circumstances; others look
to how Jesus treats tax collectors and gentiles throughout the scriptures and
sees it as an instruction to embrace any stray members into the fold. Another
view is sees these tensions as due to the incorporation of conflicting
traditions in the history of the community’s development, or to applying them
to different cases. It is clear, however, that if Matthew’s church does not
already have a procedure for disciplining dangerously errant members, one is
here provided, spoken in the name of Jesus. It supposes a community where the
concern is more for the group as a whole than for any individual members – a
concept totally foreign to the modern western world. It encourages, indeed
mandates, pastoral intervention that goes further than just forgiveness and
advice. It sees a way of life where Church is more than a once a week event,
but a constant and aware community that exists beyond individual differences.
Conflict seen through this lens becomes a normal and
accepted part of living in community. It is not a cause for hidden aggression
behind closed doors, where power imbalances and personality types can
overwhelm. Nor does it allow the whispered rumours and malicious gossip that
can easily pervade a community, even if only encouraged by a few. Conflict
becomes an opportunity to grow in love for one another, to embrace and be
opened to a differing point of view, even if there is no clean and complete
resolution. We are not called to conformity, but to community. There is room
for many interpretations and debates, as long as they are start with love and
finish with reconciliation.
When we are gathered here today, we take the opportunity
before sharing in communion to give each other the peace. Have you ever thought
about what that means? I learned from a slightly unexpected source. When I was
in formation I spent 6 months intensive training in a small group with a
certain gentleman who was, in many ways, polar opposite to me. It was a hard
time for all of us I think, possibly especially for him, as an alpha males type
in a group including myself, a catholic religious, a Baptist healer and a few
other strong women. On one occasion our training involved attending an
ecumenical ANZAC day remembrance ceremony within the hospital we were placed,
and he chose not to attend. Being the forthright group we were, there was no
hesitation in questioning (and challenging) his reasons and motivation. When we
gathered again soon afterwards for a Eucharist, I asked him how he could move
on so quickly from the oh so close to brawl we had just had. He looked very
surprised and said, “Josie, when we come together for communion we are brothers
and sisters in Christ. It doesn’t matter what I think of you at that moment –
we are joined as one in the body of Christ”.
His words have stuck with me since. We are offering to each
other the peace of God. This is not a social event. This is not a token shaking
of hands. We are putting aside our differences and reconciling with one another
before we partake in the body and blood of Christ. If we are not truly able to share
God’s peace, how can we be fit to share God’s body? Could this be a time when
we should be actively seeking out those with whom we have struggled and
offering them our hand with love?
True peace is not a burying of difference, hiding it away
until we can take it out to peruse at our leisure. It is not some kind of false
martyrdom, pushing aside our needs in order to keep the road smooth and the
boat quiet. True peace is knowing that no matter our differences, we have been
made one with Christ. True peace is knowing that I will not let conflict hide
in my heart and escape through belittling, passive aggressive comments or
explode with verbal or emotional violence.
If God is to be found in relationship, then evil is to be
found in those relationships when broken and not repaired. If evil is found in
maliciousness and hatred, God is found in forgiveness and restoration. We have
an obligation to make reconciliation of relationship a priority in our personal
AND public lives. As a Church, we are required to embody this vision of
community for the benefit of the wider world.
